{5 Things You Didn’t Know About Your Husband}

September 17, 2014

5ThingsYouDidntKnowAboutYourHusband

I’ve been married now almost 3 years {in just a few short weeks}. Now, you’re probably saying “ohhh you are still newlyweds!” Yes, we are. That being said, I’m here to tell you a few things you didn’t know about your husband, until after you married him.

  1. He Believes in Fairies
  2. It’s true, he does! I promise you. You are going to be floored once you realize he believes in toilet paper fairies, dish washing fairies, laundry fairies, the possibilities are endless. FAIRIES EVERYWHERE. Yea, see he apparently believes that magical fairies dart around your house, on their sparkly little wings, delivering toilet paper when rolls are empty, putting the dishes in the dishwasher when they are left in the sink, and they even do the laundry and put it away. His belief in the supernatural will come as a surprise to you, so I’m glad I’m here to prepare you. You’re welcome.

  3. He Really Cannot Hear You
  4. Ladies…ladies. Stop getting pissed. Stop. Okay so you’re pissed, I get it. No way he didn’t hear you, right? WRONG. He actually cannot hear you. Is he watching TV? Nope, can’t hear you. Is he playing video games? Nope, can’t hear you. Is he on the computer? Nope, can’t hear you. Want to know why? He’s concentrating so hard on whatever is in front of him that he truly does not hear you. He doesn’t, swear to the heavens above. That man, that hot, intelligent, giving, beautiful, wonderful man, cannot hear you. Because he can only do one thing, ONE, at a time. Which leads me to #3…

  5. He Can Only Do One Thing at a Time
  6. I know. I KNOW. People you told you this. Studies have shown it. It’s true. Men CANNOT multitask. It is damn near impossible for them. So when you ask him to do something, and then in the middle of that ask for something else. it ain’t gonna happen sister. So I encourage you to let him complete the first task, then ask for another. Or, make him a list. That way, you can’t get pissed that he didn’t do what you asked. It’s on paper! So he can’t claim #2 or #3. Or can he? Of COURSE he can! But don’t let him. I mean you could, but I’m too much of a PITA {Pain in the A$$} to let him claim #2 or #3.

  7. He Likes Chore Charts
  8. I’m serious, he does. Please refer to #3. Men love lists. Want to know why? Because he doesn’t remember what you said before he left for the grocery store. He also doesn’t remember you asking him to take out the recycling while he was watching ESPN {because he really couldn’t hear you}. So make him a chore chart. I mean you don’t have to call it that, call it like “Dad Duties” or “Honey Do-List” I don’t know, come up with something that doesn’t make him feel like he’s in Kindergarten. But make that damn chore chart. You’ll thank me later.

  9. He Has Trouble Retaining Your Conversations
  10. You talk a lot. Oh shut up, yes you do. We all do. We love to talk. We talk about anything and everything. And let’s be honest, our husbands become our besties whether they want to or not. So we end up talking to them about EVERYTHING. Poor husband. Also, we have a pretty awesome memory. I don’t know how we do it ladies, but I can still remember what I wore for pictures in the 4th grade {a purple cabbage patch kid jumper with a white polo, in case you were wondering}. Him, not so much. He has trouble remembering what happened yesterday let alone two weeks ago when you told him about your girlfriend’s terrible day at work. He did not retain that. He didn’t. He never will. He forgot you even had that conversation. Oh come on, he probably wasn’t even listening. So cut him some slack. Unless it was important, then just throat punch him {kidding, please don’t hit your husband}.

    There you have it ladies. Aren’t you glad we’re friends so I can tell you these things? You’re welcome! *wink*

    Hugs and Love from TheMcBaileys.com

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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Becky September 18, 2014 at 7:03 pm

Hilarious truth. Great!

Reply

themcbaileys September 25, 2014 at 1:46 pm

Ha! Thank you Becky!! 🙂

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Kim September 17, 2014 at 8:47 pm

Love it! And yes, it made me chuckle!

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themcbaileys September 18, 2014 at 11:26 am

Ha! Good – people seem to be taking me seriously these days. Are they crazy?!?! 🙂

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Amanda September 17, 2014 at 8:06 pm

Hammer meet nail head.

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themcbaileys September 18, 2014 at 11:27 am

*laughing* Good to know that I’ve summed up husbands across the planet. *kidding..maybe* 🙂

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Mia @ The Chronicles of Chaos September 17, 2014 at 4:51 pm

Hahaha, I love this. So true. The fairy thing… sigh. Makes me want to punch goats. 😛

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themcbaileys September 17, 2014 at 7:54 pm

PUNCH GOATS? Ummm BEST!!! Consider that officially stolen!

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Courtney September 17, 2014 at 4:15 pm

And after 10 years of marriage, I can say it’s all true…and will never change. Sigh.

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themcbaileys September 17, 2014 at 7:41 pm

Laughing – but you HAVE to love it about them. They really can’t help it!! 🙂

Reply

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